It Ain't Easy Being (Andy) Green
You hear the stories. The coach who regularly sleeps in his office. The assistant constantly on the road recruiting. The football strength coaches who have to be at the 6:00 AM and 9:00 PM lifts everyday.
The stories you don't hear as much: the spouses at home trying to maintain a semblance of normalcy in marriages that are anything but normal.
I'm a married man of 23 years, a father of five wonderful children. And I've found that being an attentive husband and a good dad takes work and a LOT of time.
And I've long wondered how marriages are nurtured and parental bonds are strengthened when one spouse is just...not around as much as the other.
Andy Green has been married to Shauna for 23 years. They have one 11-year old son, Matteo. When I sat down with Andy and asked what it was like to be a dad with a high-profile wife who works 70+ hours, his first words were:
"Honestly, a lot falls on me."
Andy and I met for coffee in early August. He was decked out in Illini gear, the only appropriate attire for his post-interview destination: Ubben. Andy and Matteo spend a lot of time at Ubben in the summer. Shauna puts in 10-12 hour workdays, and family time for the Greens is often found more on the basketball court than in the living room.
"It's definitely a home away from home in the summer months."
Andy Green grew up in Bellevue, Iowa, about 40 miles north of Clinton, Shauna's hometown. Andy was no stranger to the game of basketball when he met his future wife; he played college basketball at Clinton Community College and Mt. St. Clare College, also in Clinton. When he was a senior, he was introduced to a young Shauna Geronzin.
"How I met Shauna was actually through her sister, Jessica. We were friends in college and her boyfriend (now husband) was a teammate of mine. We were both in another teammate's wedding and I had just broken up with my girlfriend. Jessica said that she was going to bring her sister so we could just talk...but she didn't tell Shauna (the plan). Later in the evening, I approached her and said 'Hey, I think you owe me a dance.' And we've been together ever since.
"And I caught the garter at the reception and gave it to her on our wedding day. Our first real date we went to see Runaway Bride and I gave her the ticket stub from that at our wedding, too."
Shauna and Andy are three years apart, so they had to date long distance for a time since Shauna was playing basketball at Canisius College in Buffalo, New York. In Shauna's senior year, Andy got a teaching job in Buffalo to be closer to her.
That would not be the last move the couple would make once they were married. Shauna's coaching journey took them to Loras College, Providence, Dayton, Northwestern, and Dayton again until winding up in Champaign in 2022.
I asked Andy what Illini fans did not know about the decision to take the Illini job:
"I initially was like, ‘Why are they coming (to recruit Shauna)? No way.’ We had beat them that year at Dayton, and I was like, yo, you guys are a hot mess. I thought we’d hear them out and then we'll just send them on their way, right? Pretty much do the polite thing. And then I sat there and listened to them for three hours, and then said, ‘Can I ask some questions?’ And I asked them really, really hard questions. And they were very honest, and they answered them head on, didn't dodge anything, and then they left.
"And then Shauna asked me, ‘What do you think?’ I said I was intrigued, and she's like, ‘Really?’ Because everybody said don't do it. And then Josh (Whitman) came a second time to meet with us while the men were playing in Pittsburgh. I'm pretty sure he drove over, which is about a four hour drive and then he drove back. He brought groceries and all this stuff. It was funny, but it was very awkward and uncomfortable. But it showed us what he was about.
"And they did everything in their power to make us feel wanted. They laid out a very clear vision of what they thought the program could be. I asked some hard questions about that and they answered all of them. At one point, I just said, ‘I'm good with that.’"
Once the decision was made, Andy had plenty ahead of him to transition from his job and life in Dayton to Illinois.
"I had to call my boss that night, and she's like, ‘What's going on? Where are you going?’ And I'm like, I can't tell you until it's released, but you'll know soon enough. And then I told my students because I had just been gone for the NCAA tournament and was back to school for a couple hours, and I was gonna be gone for two more days. I'm like, ‘You're gonna read stuff that we're leaving, but I'm going to be here for the rest of the year.’ I was worried about their well-being…and obviously a lot of them were (Dayton) Flyer fans. (laughs) It all happened very, very quickly, and here we are."
Matteo was heading into second grade when the Greens moved to the area.
"In the move he was obviously my priority. It was a lot of change very quickly for him. He had forged some really great relationships. That portion of it was hard. You're always worried about your family first. But it’s been cool to spend the past four years with him."
Andy has been an elementary school teacher for more than two decades. I asked him how he got into the profession.
“My summer job was lifeguarding and teaching swimming lessons, and I really liked interacting with kids. And then I was still actually still in college when I got my first High School coaching job and just, I felt like I had a connection with (the students). I was good at it and I just felt like there's not a lot of positive role male role models in the profession.
"It's kind of funny when you take a college course. It was usually like 28 women and me and one other guy. (laughs) It was pretty evident that it's not always the case that there's a lot of males involved, and I just thought I could make an impact. You really get into it to impact lives and change lives a lot, like coaching, right? They're one of the same. And you can have a lot of impact as a guy (in this profession).”
Andy has embraced the role of "campus dad" to the players, as well:
"One of the things I say is that we have one child, but we have 15 daughters. I love them like they’re our own kids. Care about them, worry about them, protective of them on the road, and things like that.
"There's a whole lot of off the court stuff that's way bigger to me. Everybody sees them for two hours on game day, but I get to know them off the court. You get to see them come in as a young kid and leave as a woman, and (then) go out into the world and do great things. So that's really cool. I feel blessed.
"I feel sad for some people because I feel like sometimes (the players) get judged for their game day performance and not really who they are. And I guess that’s natural, right? But I also think that if the fan knew them as a person, I don't think they would do that. If they had that connection that I get to have with a lot of them. And again, that takes time too. At the end of the day they spend more time with me, and I spend more time with them than they do their own families, right? We spend a lot of time together.
"That's the great part about it. And when on the road, it's just us and a couple other fans, and it can be a little bit rowdy...it's just you against the world. And that's awesome. You're in your foxhole together, and you think, ‘let's shut this place up.’”
Andy had plenty to say about their son, Matteo, including how he got his name:
"I was favoring the name Grayson. At the time it was super popular, and then Grayson Allen was playing, and you know, Grayson can be Grayson Allen sometimes, so I was like we might have a little bit of a Grayson Allen at times on our hands. (laughs)
"Shauna's sister was minoring in Italian. And I think her professor's husband was named Matteo. It means Matthew, "Gift of God," so that's where it came from. He has a double middle name. It's Christian Brian. Shauna came up with Christian. Brian is named after my brother who passed when I was a kid. (Brian was killed in a car accident in 1986 on the night of his high school Homecoming.) I decided I wanted to give him part of his name."
I have a son Matteo's age, so I knew him first when he was dominating my kid's teams in baseball and basketball.
"The natural perception is that we probably push him to play (basketball), and we really don't. We just want him to be passionate about something, and I think he thinks that we expect him to be like this elite player, but we just want him to be a good person.
"(Shauna) emphasizes to Matteo that, just like she does with her players, do things the right way. Be a good teammate. As far as how he conducts himself on the court, he's a little bit of both of us: I'm more competitive and quiet about it, and Shauna is pretty competitive and very visual about it.
"And I think Teo's a little bit more like her in that sense that he kind of can't get out of his own way sometimes. You know, we're working on that, but he's a big time competitor. Yeah, but again, we tell him we don't care if he scores 200 points or two points or no points, just be a good teammate and do things the right way.
"You get to do a lot of cool things that most people don't, and I kind of remind our son of that a lot. Hey, not everybody gets to get on a plane that's chartered for a team and just walk off, and there's a bus waiting for you to take you to your hotel, and we’re staying at this nice hotel and your food's there and this and that…it's not how the real world works. It's kind of funny. Sometimes, when we fly (commercial) for vacations and stuff, he'll say, ‘Oh, so we're checking in and stuff?’ Yes, this is how we and most people do it. (laughs)"
“I was telling him recently that he's living a lifestyle that we didn't. And I think he knows that. We took him back to Iowa last week, and I said, ‘This is one of the houses I grew up in.’
"And he says, ‘Oh, so you didn’t have a ton of money?’ and I was like, ‘No, where do you get that idea?’ (laughs) You know, little things like that to keep him humble.
"I told him that he’d need to start working pretty soon if he’s not gonna play baseball. You're not just gonna sit around and chill… I want him to understand the value of a dollar and work, and you know all those things that we had to do.
“But he’s a good kid overall, we're extremely blessed.”
"Working hard" came up a lot in our conversation. I asked Andy if the Greens have a guiding principle as a family.
"(Here are three): doing things the right way, treating people the right way, working hard. They're simple, but hard in practice, right?...and sometimes people make it hard."
And later when I asked about pivotal people in their lives:
"(For Shauna) I would say her parents, both of them. Her mom's toughness: she fought cancer and battled it and won. And her dad: very helping and caring. Between the two of them, they also taught her to treat people the right way. Do things the right way. Don't take shortcuts, work hard. You get the results.
"You hear her say those things consistently. You've probably read it in articles, but her message isn't changing. Clinton is very blue collar where she's from. It's a lot of factories, a lot of hard workers.
"And I think that's all she knows is to work hard and you reap the benefits if you put in the work. And I think that's her message...and I think she sets a great example that for our son too, I tell her that all the time. I think the biggest compliment I give her is (Matteo) gets to see the one of the greatest definitions of hard work every day. I don't think he may get it yet, but someday he's gonna look back and say 'Whoa, that's why she was what she was because she put in the work, right?'"
The pivotal person for Andy:
"My grandfather, my mom's dad. Good person, open-minded, non-judgmental, self-made. He was in real estate, an auctioneer farmer at one point, suffered a lot of loss. My mom, when she was 10, was in a car accident with her two siblings and her mom...my mom's the only one that survived. So, to experience that...he was always just somebody I looked up to, and he looked out for me as a kid, too. I try to be a lot like him.
"From a father's standpoint, I think Shauna dad’s a great example. And when he gives me a compliment...yeah, that's awesome."
A high-profile job like Division One basketball coach comes with some baggage. I asked Andy how it was to be "on" all the time in public spaces.
"I think it's great. I would rather have it that people are interested than not interested, you know what I mean? It's a good problem.
"We were out with some family; my sister and my brother-in-law came in, and Shauna's mom, we went out. It was like the Kentucky Derby weekend last year, and it was also Matteo's First Communion. So we all had dinner while Shauna's dad took Matteo to the movies. We decided to run around downtown a little bit after, and I told my sister, you're gonna see that this as a thing.
"And then we got home and she's like, I cannot believe (how much attention we got). Even when we've gone back to Iowa last year with my sister, we went out on the river, and we're at this little restaurant. Two other people at the restaurant (were whispering), 'Is that Shauna Green?’ The same thing at the coffee shop in my hometown. So I think that part of it's a little a little hard for her, too, at times. It's not very often when she feels uncomfortable and wants to leave. But sometimes there is."
Do the Greens have people in their lives with whom they can let their guards down?
"Yeah, a hundred percent: the staff. We hang out a lot off of the court and outside of Ubben. We are truly a big family. A lot of people throw that around, but we really are. We're there for each other, whatever we need. Overall, we can just kind of be us around them."
What is a downside of being married to a Division One basketball coach?
“Probably the one downfall is the the lack of time that we get together. During the season she's working 10-12 hour days. We have to make the most of (the time we do have together)...her job is very demanding. I don't think people understand. I think they think it's like just the season…'now what do they do when the season's over?’ No, it's a 365 days of the year thing, minus their shutdown periods, which is like five days here and five days there throughout the year.
"And she's always gone, busy with speaking engagements. I don't think people understand how many things she does outside of her job that doesn't have to, to try to get the public to come out to games. I don't think in four years she's said no to anybody because she just wants to try to build it and make it really a community thing.
“You learn that Champaign’s kind of like, just like a big web. Everything's connected in some sort of way. I think somebody told me when we first got here: It's the biggest small town you’ll ever live in, and it's so true. It’s a good thing.”
Andy weighed in on the gradual increase in attendance at SFC for games:
“It's getting there. I think there's still room to grow. I mean, if you look into the State Farm Center, there's way more room to grow…I get it, maybe not everybody has the means to buy tickets, but if you do, please continue to buy them and come out. It's a good product, and it's very family friendly, and you don’t have to pay for parking. It's very feasible. That's the best part for me is we haven't changed anything since I've been here either. The University has done a good job of keeping it where it's affordable as much as possible.
“I go to a lot of road games as much as we can, and especially on the weekends. And then you go to these other places, and there's ten, five, eight thousand, fourteen thousand fans, and you're like, ‘Can't we do this, too?’ So that's the one thing…and I think she has been very verbal about that as well…continue to come out and be a part of it. And I think we'll get there. I think we're on our way.”
How do you nurture your marriage?
"I think a lot of compromise. I'm not going to sit here and say it's the easiest job in the world to be the spouse of a coach. It's a lot of time apart. I don't know if that helps or hurts our relationship. (laughs) There can be some tough times when there's some losses stacking up or other things going on that the fans in the outside world don't know about. Sometimes that can impact your home life. It's only natural. If I have a rough day at work, I come home and I might not be in the greatest mood, right? That's part of it. And I think it takes a lot of understanding and patience and, and at the end of the day, all that comes from a good place, right? We all want to be the best versions of ourselves and win and represent the school in the right way.
"I think being together for over half of her life, I think I know her better than anybody on the planet, and there's sometimes somebody will say something and I'm just like, ‘uh oh, how are we gonna handle that?’ Whether it be at a radio show or post game or something, and I think, ‘Oh, don't ask that right now.’ Or if it's something like, ‘What did you think of the foul discrepancy?’ or something, I'm thinking, ‘Don't say it! Don’t get suspended or fined.’ (laughs) But yeah, I think it's just probably a good understanding who the other person is. I think we're all wired in our own way. I think we balance each other out really well.
"Shauna once gave some advice to one of her assistant coaches: 'Marry your best friend, because they're always going to be there.' Wins, losses, good times, bad times. You got to have that person, so marry your best friend if you can, and so that's what I did."
What part of Shauna's personality does the typical fan not get to see?
"I think a lot of people see the intensity and the fire in her. And I think that's great, but she has a soft side that people don't get to see a lot. She's an unbelievable mother. A great friend. She's loyal to a fault, And she's an amazing mom. When she's present, she's unbelievable. I see the way Matteo looks at her when she's not looking. So it's really cool for me to see how much he admires her.
"It's such an interesting profession in the sense that, win or lose, you turn the page pretty quickly. As soon as the press conference is over, she's feeling good about the game if we won…but it's ‘Enjoy that for the night, but now we're turning the page to Maryland’ or whoever’s next on the schedule, and then your focus is solely on that for the next couple days. It's just many seasons within the season. I think that's probably one of her talents, she's got that day-to-day, moment-to-moment process. She never lets herself get too high, or too low.”
Does Shauna have any hidden talents?
"She's a pretty good artist. She can draw a little bit. She's also super organized, too. I don't know if that's a talent, maybe more of a skill.
"She has an unusual knack for being able to try something for the first time and be really good at it. It's kind of frustrating, you know. I'll go out and play golf with her, and she doesn't touch a club in 12 months, and then she'll hit it (better than me). And she'll say, ‘Well, yours went to the right’ and I'll be like, thanks for pointing that out. (laughs) We're both competitive like that, and have a little banter back and forth.
"And she's got a green thumb like no other. Our house is a botanical gardens, and I think it's therapeutic for her, too. She comes home and waters them, picks at them...and we have a lot. A lot, a lot. (laughs) It takes me like a half hour when she's gone to water them all."
Books came up in our conversation. I asked about their reading habits.
"I don't really have the time (during the school year) to read a lot. I'm so busy getting Matteo from A to B to C to D. And that's fine, I like being an involved dad.
"I love Mitch Albom books. I love John Wooden books. And I'm not a Duke fan, but I do love Coach K's 'Five-Point Play' book.
"Shauna is a big-time reader. She always has multiple books going including audiobooks. She's very into military training, SEAL stuff...things that can help her find an edge. She reads a LOT. Between the two of us, I'm not even on her level."
Are the Greens movie aficionados?
“I'm probably the movie watcher in the house for sure. It's got to be something she's kind of into for her to sit down, and then next thing you know, you'll look over, and she’s not even paying attention. ‘Oh, I gotta take this (recruiting call).’ Depending on the kid? I'm like, go get her.
“Or I’ll put something on and she’ll say, 'I’m not watching this stupid movie. Put something else on.' (laughs) She’s more into documentaries.”
(Some of Andy’s favorite movies: Hoosiers, Remember the Titans, The Fighter.)
I was so grateful that Andy spent 90 minutes answering questions with candor and good humor. Knowing that Andy has an extensive basketball background himself, I had one more question: Does Shauna ever ask for input on X's and O's?
“There’s times when I’ll give her an out of bounds play or something…there was this one time in Minnesota, I was sitting next to Josh, and we scored a much-needed bucket late. Shauna turned around to give me a look, and Josh was like, ‘Whoa, what was that look for?’ I told him, 'That was my play!'” (laughs)
