Portal-Free Since 2023

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?

Pilgrims. 

As I’ve told you before, my dad navigated the world through jokes. It’s how men of his age communicated. You’re standing around in line at the bank in 1979, you see Fred, and as you and Fred wait in line together (it's not like you could bank online), it’s “hey Fred have you heard the one about the…” time. This time of year “Mayflowers bring pilgrims” was in the rotation for Robert L. Rosenthal. And so here’s Robert A. Rosenthal repeating the same boilerplate joke 35 years later.

As an aside to that aside, I think of “April showers bring May flowers” during every single April rain storm my entire life. Not making that up. Every single one. In my brain, it’s always “I wish it wasn’t going to rain tomorrow, but if we want the world to be colorful in May…” 

ANYWAY, it’s now May. Which means I can now write this article. I couldn’t write this article in April because since 2023 I've celebrated Portal-Free April. Those of us who observe Portal-Free April ignore the transfer portal the entire month. We mute the words “transfer” and “portal” on Twitter in April. We care about our sanity, so we flee the insanity of April. 

What are we fleeing from? Silly season. “I’m hearing” season. “You think you’re following a sports website, but really you’re following TMZ” season. I go out of my way to avoid anything and everything having to do with “things are looking good with {transfer} choosing {school}” season. 

Want to have some fun? Go to Twitter right now and search for the words “one of the top players in the portal”. I’ll bet you had no idea that there are more than 100 One Of The Top Players In The Portalses. It’s so amazing that over 100 schools brought in one of the top players in the portal. I’m guessing there will be at least 60 schools in the Top-25 when it comes out in November!